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Writer's pictureAlexa Castillo

Love Perspective

"love who you want to love at any time you want to love"


Flashback to Sept 18, 2013


As we continue to live and grow each day, our opinions and thoughts change sporadically. I say this because lately a lot of my points of views on certain topics have changed drastically, mostly because I’ve experienced some feelings and emotions that I had never felt before, as well as found myself in situations I had never been part of before. This is why they say, time teaches you everything.


My friend had been nagging me for a while to watch a movie called “From Prada to Nada”. She said the two main characters reminded her of me and her sister. We finally watched it together last week and I’m still trying to figure out how exactly I reminded her of the girl in the movie, but that’s beside the point. To continue, one of the sisters was the nerdy, book worm, plan and schedule everything, no interest in relationships type. However after a couple of life changing events take place, she meets a guy and falls in love with him. They had only known each other for a couple of weeks and hadn’t yet dated or even kissed, but they were in love with each other. My friend instantly scoffed and made a sarcastic remark, making fun of the fact they barely even knew each other and already loved each other and said corny things.


I didn’t say anything, but I paused and started thinking to myself about how I at one point also had this mentality. Granted in this case it was a movie, but I remember when I was in high school I used to just laugh at another close friend of ours because every time she would get a new boyfriend, she loved them like in 3 weeks. The idea was absurd to me. “How can a person love someone they hardly know in such little time” were my mental thoughts.

Maybe the fact that I didn’t really have boyfriends in high school ((since I would stay stuck on one guy for years and then gradually move on, but not one single one of them liked me back lol)) is the reason why I didn’t realize it sooner, but being in love is a crazy, silly and great thing. I have to admit, I still don’t like- much less love, potential boyfriends that easily, but I do have to say I am not judgmental towards my friends or other people who love so quickly anymore. And I will tell you why.


That friend of mine ((that scoffed at the movie)) and I are in somewhat of a similar situation with what you can say are our current love interests. They are both dreadfully unfortunate circumstances, nothing tragic ((life-wise)) but pretty heavy for the heart ((love-wise)), yet we are still crazy about them and would do almost anything at our reach in order to make them feel the same as we do, but at the end of the day we are not getting what we want so we are not exactly happy.  So now I ask myself, why is it ok for unhappy people in any type of frustrating relationship, be it talking, dating or married to be in love with each other, yet such a crazy idea for people who just met each other but make each other so happy to be in love with each other. It’s really isn’t fair to think of them as foolish. Come to think about it, depending which perspective you choose to see it from, it is more bizarre for someone to be in love with a person they know for a long time but doesn't treat them all that great or give them the deserved attention, than for someone to be in love with another person that hasn’t ever done one wrong thing to them and get along in complete sync, even if they only know each other for a single month. If you are happy and feel in love, then that is exactly what you feel and no one can tell you otherwise.


I am really glad my thoughts and way of thinking on this matter have transitioned with time and also that I’ve been in both great and terrible positions. I feel I have learned from each of them, and became better at providing comforting advice or successful solutions rather than not exactly having any comments to sooth other friends currently going through the same thing. I’ve also developed a sense of understanding that creates a new bond with any individual I can help because it makes them feel some sort of comfort to know that someone else gets exactly what they mean.


To sum it up, love who you want to love at any time you want to love even if people think you are completely crazy. They can’t feel what you feel so don’t listen to them, they are the crazy ones =). Whether you stay in love for only another week, month or year, it’s still what you felt at that moment and that’s what counts.


- Alexa (Intellect Chick)

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